What of the ordinary, everyday love? Does it have a place in the Hallmark-tainted
landscape of Valentine’s Day?
If you are like me, you can spend literally hours pouring
over glossy, glitter embossed cards that drip with romantic musings and
passionate declarations that seem overdone and impractically over the top. Truth
is, this is a holiday that seems to be more for the young and newly minted kind
of love, that “first three months of can’t get enough of each other” kind of
love.
I get it though…that
kind of love is sexy and passionate, all red and pulsing with promise. That kind of
love moves some serious chocolate. That
kind of love fuels lingerie sales and fancy, overpriced plated dinners.
Still…every day, 365 days of the year, all over the world,
there are people quiet living in other kinds of love that don’t get the
attention worthy of a glitzy holiday. Where are the cards that represent the
kind of love that settles in after years spent together, after raising
children? The kind of love that binds
partners and knits families together to weather all that life asks us to bear? I need cards that celebrate the everyday,
mundane things that show me I am loved and appreciated. I need words that express my devotion despite
disappointment and my simple joy in sharing life with someone that I love and, frankly, that I tolerate above any other human
being on the planet. I need a Hallmark
card that says, “Yup I would absolutely still choose you, choose this messy beautiful
life with you, over and over again.”
Admittedly, that does not sound romantic. It would not make
most people swoon. It would not fill even one red and pink stained aisle at
Target. But, that is the truth. It is
sincere and it is heartfelt. It is practical and it is sustainable. It is the
lifeblood of any solid marriage or long term relationship and the foundation
for any family that endures.
I would love to have spontaneity and passion all the time,
but I am also blissfully happy to find out someone else has changed the toilet paper
roll or done the dishes to surprise me. I would enjoy date nights out under the
stars but I also crave those quiet nights by the fire, when we are all tangled
together under blankets watching a movie. Sometimes it is the moments when he
randomly laces his fingers through mine while we are driving, or takes a few
more minutes to cover me with the comforter before he leaves for work that move
me so much more deeply than those heated moments of our youth. I love that he
loves me when things are good, and loves me harder and more fiercely when they
are not. It may not make for a flashy
card but it a blessing I am thankful for each and every day.
